Ah, your wedding day – a day filled with love, delight, and sweet anticipation. One of the most highly anticipated wedding day moments is when the couple sees each other for the first time. If you’re mulling over the idea of a pre-ceremony First Look for your wedding, I’ve got you covered. Here is everything you need to know about First Looks, from their history to how one can affect the flow of your special day.
What Is A Wedding First Look?
The Traditional History
When it comes to traditional weddings, there is no First Look. Couples deliberately avoid seeing each other on their wedding day until the ceremony itself. Some view it as a superstition, while others cherish the thrill of the big reveal. Like many wedding traditions, the history of this custom might not be as lovey-dovey as you’d expect.
Centuries ago, when arranged marriages were the order of the day, families were determined to ensure their daughters’ future with well-to-do grooms from respectable families. To achieve this, they imposed a strict rule – no peeks at the bride or groom until they stood together at the altar. This was primarily to eliminate any chance of the groom getting cold feet, especially if he had doubts about his bride’s appearance. Not the most romantic beginning, right? This is also where the tradition of the bridal veil comes from – it was meant to conceal the bride’s face until the very last moment possible.
Despite its somewhat “practical” beginnings, saving the First Look for the ceremony has evolved into something truly heartwarming. So many couples eagerly anticipate seeing their soon-to-be spouses, looking their absolute best, from opposite ends of the aisle.
The Modern Wedding First Look
In recent years, that eagerly awaited first glimpse has evolved into a cherished experience for couples, enriched with added intimacy. Today, it’s increasingly popular for couples to arrange a ‘First Look’ before their ceremony. They’ll usually coordinate this with their wedding photographer so they can have photos to relive the moment. It still carries the same excitement and emotions as that classic aisle encounter but with an extra layer of privacy. It allows the couple an opportunity to share a precious and quiet moment in each other’s company – a rare gem on a bustling wedding day.
Benefits of a Wedding First Look
During a wedding day filled to the brim with plans and excitement, the First Look offers peace and privacy. It is an intimate moment for the couple to connect, away from the curious gazes of their guests. Beyond the emotional significance, there are several photography and timeline advantages to consider. Having a First Look can provide a lot of options in structuring your wedding day timeline.
Once you two have seen each other, you can capture many photos earlier in the day than you could traditionally. With a First Look done, you and your wedding photographer can tackle Wedding Party photos, family portraits, and even romantic couple’s shots before the ceremony gets underway. Many couples enjoy breaking up their romantic portraits into multiple chunks so their time together doesn’t feel like non-stop photos. Not only does this trim down the post-ceremony photo time, but it also ups your chances of savoring a bit of your cocktail hour, if that’s high on your wish list.
Twists on the Trend
Wedding First Look with Dad
Traditions are constantly evolving, and the First Look custom is evolving in such a lovely way! One trend that has captured the hearts of modern couples is sharing a special First Look moment with their fathers. This has sprung up more recently as an add-on or spin-off of the First Look moments between couples. Instead of waiting until the walk down the aisle, many are choosing to begin their wedding day by sharing a moment with their fathers, to savor the love and support of the person who has been their rock, their guide, and their confidant.
Fathers everywhere are loving this chance to create an everlasting memory, to steal away from the crowd and soak in the sheer joy and bond between a father and his child. It’s an opportunity to have a heartfelt conversation and let emotions flow freely. It reinforces treasuring these precious moments with loved ones and adds an extra layer of love and meaning to the big day.
Some opt to have a First Look with only their father, not their partner. Many others want to have a special moment with both — in which case they usually have their moment with Dad first, followed by the reveal to their partner. As a San Diego wedding photographer, I’ve seen even more variations — such as First Looks with a child of one or both partners, wedding party First Looks, and even more!
First Touches
Let’s talk about the rising trend of the First Touch moment. This pre-ceremony ritual allows you and your partner to connect through touch and presence alone, without seeing each other. Picture this: you’re moments away from saying “I do,” and in that shared moment, you hold hands, feel each other’s heartbeat, and share a few whispered promises. It’s a blend of excitement, nerves, and love that many couples are choosing over the First Look. The allure of the First Touch lies in its intimacy and the chance to calm those pre-wedding jitters together, setting the stage for a day filled with shared moments and heartfelt connection. This option is perfect for the couple who want to share a moment of quiet before the festivities start, exchanging support and love—but who still want to save seeing each other until they walk down the aisle.
When a Wedding First Look May Not Be Your Perfect Match
Wondering if a First Look is right for your wedding? While it can be a fantastic addition, it doesn’t suit every couple. Some hold the tradition of that special reveal at the ceremony close to their hearts, fearing an earlier reveal might dilute the magic. While my personal experience doesn’t show that, it’s your day – prioritize what aligns best with your values.
Another aspect to keep in mind is the influence of cultural and religious factors. Certain customs might advise against, or even forbid, the concept of First Looks before the ceremony. If these traditions are meaningful to you and your loved ones, it’s important to give them careful consideration and respect.
Ultimately, every couple (and therefore every wedding) is unique, and what works for one might not work for another. Trust your instincts and go with the flow that feels most authentic to you.
